Everything I’ve Learned About Feedback

Giving Feedback

The COIN Conversation Model can be used when you want to give feedback to someone in a professional (or personal) setting.

• Context: This involves setting the stage for the feedback by providing relevant background information and context.
• Observation: This involves stating specific behaviors or actions that were observed, rather than making judgments or assumptions about the person’s intentions.
• Impact: This involves describing the effects or consequences of the behaviors or actions on the team, the project, or the individual receiving the feedback.
• Next Steps: This involves suggesting steps that the individual or group can take to improve or address the issue identified in the feedback.

In Book Review: Buy Back Your Time , you can also use the COACH framework which is similar. A key difference is the Change section which makes it more explicit if the other person can commit to the change you’d like to see.

1. Co: Core Issue - Describe what the specific problem or area of concern is.
2. A: Actual Story - Describe an actual instance when that manifested.
3. Ch: Change - Ask the other person if they can make a commitment to change.

Receiving Feedback

• Feedback is received from people who care about you. Listen to it without judgment, gather as many of the facts as possible.
• Always thank the person you give feedback to.
• Always thank the person you receive feedback from.
• Choose what you’ll address. You’ll receive feedback that you won’t always feel compelled to action on - that being said, you’ll better understand the cost of your behavior and whether or not the tradeoff is worth it.
• You should always be receiving feedback. If you are not, you are not being bold enough.
• Many people aren’t sure whether or not to give you feedback: they’ll talk about an action or behavior that they think is too “minor” to bring up. Don’t do this.
• You want to make sure you’re hearing the feedback you’re given even if you don’t immediately agree with it. It’s encouraged to ask for clarification and specific examples.
• Your strengths are often mirror images of your weaknesses and feedback reflects that. During a 360 review, Drew Houston was told when shit hits the fan he’s great at operating under pressure and chaos; at the same time, he’s not as proactive and let’s things get to the point of chaos in order to action on them. Recognize this.

Feedback for High Performers

From Stripe Press — Scaling People

• People typically stray away from giving feedback to high performers because they’re already so good. This is bad because high performers need feedback.
• Common problems with high performers:
  • They burn out others around them. For example, an engineer who spends their whole weekend so that the team has 10 PRs to review on Monday morning, preventing them from getting what they wanted to get done.
  • They burn themselves out. If given lots of work, they’ll get it done, but not realize the personal toll it takes on them.
  • They don’t know how to delegate.
• Common solutions for high performers:
  • Collect feedback from their peers to ensure that others actually enjoy working with them.
  • Encourage high performers to set boundaries, take regular breaks, and engage in activities out of work.
  • Offer training programs that focus on effective delegation skills. Teach high performers how to identify tasks suitable for delegation, select the right team members, and communicate expectations clearly.
  • Create a culture where team members feel comfortable discussing challenges and seeking support. Encourage collaboration and open communication to distribute workloads evenly. Always check in on their workload.

Appendix

• Dealing with hard feedback
• COIN Conversation Model explained with lots of Examples.